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ewwww!

What else can you say about weddings in general? There is a fine balance between sappiness and heartfelt emotion, and adding religion to the mix doesn't help.

The wedding started late, of course.

I was going to let one of the ushers sit me with the family, but mom said to wait, thinking, wrongly, that I was supposed to be part of the wedding party and would be escorted with the parents and grandparents... Um, no. So, I'm sitting here in the back of the church observing. My brother spotted me on his way in and just shook his head with a wry smile, as if I had planned this... So I could escape quickly.

The readings and the hymns are predictable. I've probably heard them before at weddings. Shame they are so unimaginative.

The church has a strange configuration. There seems to be pews on either side of the altar, and the entire wedding is on one side. But the altar is actually facing between the two sets of pews, i.e. At a 90 degree angle from the audience. All I can see back here is the side of all the celebrants' faces. The church was obviously built on a long narrow lot, and since the altar has to face thr east, this is an interesting solution. But looking at a wall by default is odd.

Here the priest is trying to make money jokes about my brother's name. These jokes are sooooo old.

Now he's talking about Christian marriage... This isn't going to be a Christian marriage, pal, I hate to break it to you that Cash is an apatheist.

Now he's making single people feel like freaks... Damn, I hate couples.

This is appalling. If this was my wedding, I'd be having a fit. Cash better appreciate that I'm sitting through this.

Now he's talking about the election...

Suffering is holy. Suffering is how you see god. Strange that just the opposite is true.

Renew their vows? Huh?

This wasn't a sacrament until 1215.

Jenn says that they will bring up their children in Christ... Um, I don't think I would ever make that vow, especially if I intended to break it. It would make me feel dirty. Actually, it makes me feel dirty just listening to it knowing that it's not terribly likely.

Kissy, kissy. They at least did a better kiss today than at the rehearsal dinner.

Weird. It's strange to think of Cash as a married man. Maybe it would seem less weird if I expected to get married myself.

Oh, geez, let's invoke heaven and the dead... Is that really necessary??

Interesting, they let two women, girls really, present the bread and wine. They never did that when I still attended church. Boys only.

The church has this gient fountain of holy water back here. It runs down the rock face. Interesting.

That's like the fifth or sixth time he's used the phrase "Christian marriage". Isn't that overkill. Can't we just talk about marriage. Don't they think it gives the impression that other marriages are, well, somehow lesser.

This guy is singing the communion section. They didn't do that when I was kid either. It was intoned. I remember the words well, but singing? Not that he's a bad singer, it's just... It reminds me of a musical.

This strange woman just came in and is standing on the groom's side, but I have idea who she is. Is she just here for communion? That's pretty tacky in the middle of a wedding. Or is she with the bride and is just confused?

They are saying the Our Father, with hands out-stretched. Is that how Jesus taught us?

It never seemed weirdd before, but watching the mass break out into handshakes as a "sign of Christ's peace" is weird to watch.

Things are winding down now...I guess they are filing out next. Cash took a moment to schmooze with the bridesmaids...Okay, not. More praying. Oh, I wonder if the whole audience still has to take communion or if just the couple gets it? I guess they are doing the full communion thing... Should I start another scandal at the wedding and take a wafer but not eat it??? No, I'm too honest, I guess.

That strange woman is leaving.

It just occurred to me that the last time I was in a church, my childhood superstitions still kicked in, and it crossed my mind that perhaps I should be worried about lightningm :). It didn't even occur to me until just now.

Boy, do I feel sorry for mom right now... not only did they have to forward and be blessed with the new couple, he's singing it again.

Yeah, every time he talks about Cash and their future children, he makes it really apparent that they don't know him very well.

They added a native american blessing at the end. Okay, that's interesting.

Intro of the couple. I guess we are done now. More later maybe.

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